If you’re stopping by for the first time after reading my post on A Widow’s Might today – welcome to my other “electronic oasis”. Most days find me sharing about my new life as a young widow. The good…the bad…the ugly… And through it all, God is still God, and He is still very, very good! Blessings!
Numbers. That’s all they are…or are they? Yesterday marked ten months since my husband’s passing, Saturday marked ten months since my nightmare began. This Tuesday will be ten months since Chris’ Homecoming celebration service; Wednesday marks ten months since my husband’s shell was buried in the depths of the earth. Thursday marks 43 months since I married that precious man. And today…ten months and one day living as a widow.
Some tell me not to “count” the passage of time, as it only worsens my grief. Others applaud the act. For me, it’s neither here nor there…I can’t escape it. I can’t tell myself not to count – to simply forget, because it’s impossible. I don’t even try. I know every 3rd, 4th, 7th, 8th, and 9th of each month. Then there are those other numbers – the 29th (his birthday), the 31st (the day I met him), the 29th (a different 29th – our first date), the 28th (the day he proposed to me), the 16th (the day he relocated to NC from VA), and the list goes on…
Our days together were amazing! Hence, the remembrance of time comes naturally.
Does it cause me to ache? Sure it does! Does it cause me to miss him all the more? Yes! But, with each day I spend on the earth – I’m closer to reuniting with him and being embraced by my Savior for all eternity.
If you haven’t seen this video yet, I encourage you to take a brief four minutes, click on the link below and watch it…you will be blessed and hopefully encouraged! If you have seen it, I’d encourage you to watch it again. Talk about perspective on time!
What Are You Living For? – Francis Chan video
Renee' says
Dearest Leah, The numbers do matter and regardless of how much we want to be beyond their impact, they often penetrate our hearts again and affect us deeply! I trust that as time passes and with the Lord’s help, the dates won’t be as devastating.
Thank you for providing the video link, Leah. Francis certainly gives us food for thought. Lord, help us find our joy in You while we experience that little red part of our ropes. Be encouraged, my friend. You are blessing us with your gifts as you journey on! Consider yourself hugged!
leahgillen says
Thank you Renee! I, too, pray that the hard impact of dates will subside, and I trust that to be so. I just love the realness of Francis Chan, and this video serves as a wake up call for me quite often when I fall into “a pit”. Thx for the “virtual hug”!
Sheila Rye says
Yes, they matter, I think they always will, different numbers for each of us but all with so much the same meaning. As I read, and type I’m at a basketball game, thinking, how many people know, who remembers, TODAY IS THE 5th….don’t you know, don’t you remember??? But the remembering is good sometimes hard, but always good….remember the numbers, hold your memories close, and hold on to Jesus tighter!!! Love you!!
leahgillen says
Well, I remember what the 5th is for you sweet Sheila, and you’ve been on my mind and my prayers quite often today! Love you too girlie!