In case you didn’t read Sunday’s post, I’m doing something a little different this week. In honor of Valentine’s Week, I’ve chosen to host a series of guest posts from some widow friends of mine. Each of these lovely gals will be sharing about their Valentine that now lives in Heaven. Monday, you had the pleasure of hearing from Candy, who shared about her precious Valentine, Bob. Tuesday, we were equally honored to read about Sheila’s sweet heavenly Valentine, Rick (on what would have been their 20th wedding anniversary). Today, I’m so excited to introduce you to Cindy. I “met” Cindy shortly after my Chris went to Heaven, as she reached out to me via Facebook/my blog to simply say she was covering me in prayer, having walked Grief Road for a few months longer than me. Her precious Mark went to live with Jesus on Christmas Eve in 2010, so she’s been traveling this grieving journey for nearly 14 months. Cindy shares frequently on her own blog, Consider It All Joy, and I encourage you to check it out sometime. However, today, please give Cindy a little “blog love” through comments and prayers. And now…here’s Cindy…
A Love Worth Sharing
Sacrifice * Commitment * Humble * Faithful
These are a few of the words that come to mind when I think about the man I spent more than 30 years loving. Our love began on a nice summer day in the small town of Bridgeport on the Eastern Slopes of the High Sierra Mountains. I happen to drive by his house and saw he was outside working on his car. I stopped, we talked, and the rest is history.
My parents bought a restaurant when I was 21, my Mark would come in for coffee on his break and eventually he began working for my parents. He was not the most handsome or suave man, but there was a sincerity that oozed from his being. I could talk to him about anything and truly that is what drew me to him.
We were married just under a year and a half after we met and never looked back. Though there were some who said it would never last…well, let’s just say that thankfully they were wrong.
Our lives were not perfect…far from it. We battled infertility early on in our marriage followed by alcoholism, financial woes and job losses. We followed the Lord’s road through fostering children and adoption since my womb was removed at age 26. We made a choice to adopt two special needs children, equally precious and equally challenging. Our faith grew as did our children and our love for one another. Bankruptcy nearly broke us as well as one of our children getting involved in drugs. Yet as I read those first four words I wrote, I know why we made it through everything we faced.
My man sacrificed many things in life so his family would have what they needed. He was committed to us no matter what we faced. He humbly put others’ needs before himself and he was faithful through it all. That reminds me of our family motto and one of the things that was on Mark’s memorial card:
Through It All: FAITH
He was not just faithful, HE EXUDED FAITH. No matter what life attempted to throw at us, he trusted in his Savior, in his Lord, in his Jesus, in his God that we would be just fine.
My Mark was raised in the country, therefore he loved to fish, hunt, camp and hike. Those are also things I learned about growing up with parents who loved to do similar things. There was one very early morning that we were sitting on a hillside (freezing by the way) watching a buck on the other hillside. I kept telling my Mark to shoot but he kept saying he wasn’t sure if it was ‘legal’ size. I knew it was but I think he just got buck fever and froze. Well, we all laughed for many years to come when we recalled the story and his statement (once he really saw the buck): “He’s got a freakin’ Christmas tree on his head!” Yes, he was a huge – more than a legal buck, who is probably still laughing at us. Hubby never took a shot!! J
I could recite story after story about our love and the life we shared for more than 30 years, but I could never do justice to the man I knew and miss to the depths of my being.
I will share this one special story, however. In the final months before his passing, I found out that he was trying to sell his 2 treasured possessions: his 1949 Chevy pick-up and his 243 rifle. Those were two things he absolutely treasured! He knew he was in his last months and wanted to purchase something for me and was willing to sell those items. I was in denial about how ill he really was and put a stop to the sell. He was heartbroken that I wouldn’t let him get rid of those things, because he wanted to give me a gift of a professional grade digital camera, and that was the only way he could do it. He was such a man of sacrifice and always wanted me to have my heart’s desire. Our oldest son now has those two precious items of Mark’s, and I have my camera (only God could work that out).
I’m thankful for this man who taught me to lean on him and be independent at the same time. He taught me to fix cars, garbage disposals, and fences; how to paint and use power tools. He encouraged me to make good financial choices, be a part of family decisions and learn new things. He just never taught me how to live without him. And friends, it has been hard, plain and simple. I love him, I miss him and it is just painful without him.
Yet, I am moving forward with this new life God has set before me. I wake up each day knowing that there is a God given purpose for my future, but it is hard to let go of the love of my past. I cannot tell you enough how grateful I am to have been blessed with such a man and such a marriage. He truly was my soul mate and for all that God blessed us with I. Am. Truly. Grateful.
